Aging at Home: How You Can Help Seniors Keep Their Independence

From a very young age, usually around our “terrible twos,” we seek independence in our lives and that search seems to peak in our late teens.  Then, once we have attained independence, we are loath to relinquish it, especially as we reach our golden years.  Independence is as powerful a concept to elderly seniors as it is to high school seniors.  Senior independence, no matter the age, is either a goal to be achieved or something to be maintained.

A recent AARP survey revealed that 90% of those over 65 desire to stay in their homes as they age.  Many equate staying in their homes with independence and it can be difficult to separate staying in their home from being independent.  However, for those with physical and/or mental disabilities, this can pose problems for them as well as those who love them.  If they cannot properly care for themselves, how can they stay in their homes alone and maintain their sense independence?

Not to worry (much) there is help for seniors living alone in the form of caregivers, in-home or otherwise.  Prior to going out and acquiring a caregiver, determine exactly what type of assistance the senior(s) in question require.  What are they capable of doing on their own and what are they incapable of doing?  If necessary, write it down.  Another thing, involve him/her in this process and keep them involved throughout.  After all, most teens will tell you that it is their life, not yours, and the elderly are no different.  Once you have determined the type of care required, then go in search of a caregiver you both can agree on.  This site from Senior Living can help:   https://www.seniorliving.org/caregiving/hire-a-caregiver/

Other things you can do to engender elderly independence is to provide assistance rather than control.  There is a fine line between the two.  After all, we all need some assistance every now and then, but we rarely ask for someone to control our lives.  Frame what you are providing as help or assistance out of love rather than control.

Next, provide support and encouragement to your senior friends or family to stay independent, but within reason.  Encourage them to run their own errands or do some light yard work if they are capable of such things.  Remember, most seek to maintain their independence to maintain a sense of purpose and control over their lives as well.  Every day chores may seem tedious to the non-elderly.  However, to them it can create a sense of accomplishment…support that.

Help for seniors living at home can also come in the form of senior-friendly upgrades to their homes and lives.  If necessary, have a chair lift, ramps, or grab bars installed.  Look into mobility aids or emergency alert systems.  There is a whole industry of senior care products available.  Find out what they would like and/or need.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, spend quality time with the seniors in your life.  Do not just simply discuss the mundane aspects of independent living with them.  Engage them with family gossip, or join them in a walk, or play board or card games, or simply ask them what they would like to do today.  Remember, while most of us crave independence we also crave companionship at the same time.  You can provide both.